Dumb Relatives

Okay. This one astounds even me.

Being black means that not everything works exactly right. In less politically correct times we called the fix a niggarig! You know, butter knife, vice grips and duct tape were the "tool box" and it was located in a kitchen drawer.

So I have this stove right? Three eyes self light. One don't. the one that don't of course is in the front. Typical black stove right? I put my good barbecue lighter out to compensate for the lack of spark. (yes I said barbecue lighter, can't keep matches!). Many, many, MANY times I have had to yell to the world at large "Don't leave my damn lighter on the stove!" To sensible people this only makes sense. But I am sure you read the title to this post, so...

I leave the house for a while. I come home. I find lighter in kitchen. BLOWN THE HELL UP!!!!! W! T! F!?!?!?!?! Who the hell sticks a grenade in a fire? If you don't know the answer to this one, read the title...

SMDH