Friday, September 26, 2008

Temporary Hiatus

Some of you may have been wondering where I have been for the last few days. Some of you probably think nothing of it because it ain't that unusual of me. BUT I have a good reason for not being here. I have been having a "beef" with the gods of energy in the old hometown. As a result my computer is suffering from a distinct lack of energeticness...

But we must press on.

So I will try to keep up with y'all as I can.

Until all of my energy needs are being met again, I shall be somewhat sparse. And coming from the library computers likely.

Of course y'all know that my excuse is gonna officially be that my comptuer is broke!!! That is at least the lie I am gonna tell in ya comment sections! Well not so much a lie, since it is broke if it don't work. And if it doesn't have something that it needs to work...

For now...

Sunday, September 21, 2008

Birthday Day!

Today is the birthday of two very special ladies. Now I was gonna do a really cool and cute tribute to them and all that. But I won't. Why? I did mention that they were "special" right?

I was gonna post pictures and all and talk nicely about them. Put my admiration all out in public and be all gushing over them and such. It would have been a spectacular performance too! One good enough to make a wife jealous!!!


I ain't gonna do that. Because one be playin' too much with Photoshop, yes we understand you got talent... And the other IS JUST FREAKING MISSING!!! AHEM...

So to the other, I will just say Happy Birthday Haremite Queen Of My Castle!!!

To the one...

Reasons Why I Might Not Come To Your Blog… By Opinionated Diva and The Second Sixty-Eight!!!

1. Comment Moderation…HATE IT!!! I know for some it’s a necessary evil, but I still hate it. When I leave a comment I like to see it right away. I also like to see what others have to say, so I’m not repeating exactly what someone has JUST said.
Well you are a lot nicer than me! I will straight up not even come by anymore if I gotta wonder if you got it or not. Usually I find that NOBODY is interesting enough for me to put up with that, blog stalkers or not...
And that word verification stuff is some bullshit too! Especially when the damn thing is longer than my comment!!!

2. Infrequent Posting…After a couple of days of nothing and not seeing you around the blog way, I just start thinking you’re on blog hiatus, so I don’t come by.
What? I KNOW you ain't trying to put a brotha on blast!!! All I know is you best have them butt cheeks around these parts on the regular. I mean harass me and e-mail stalk me. Call me and cuss me out. But you are obligated by the Harem code to come by here!!! Dammit!!!
Er... this ain't NECESSARILY about me? Oh... Well... wait... ... ... Hey!

3. Automatic Music players…*sigh* I REALLY hate these. They also slow your page down. I usually end up hitting the little “x” in the upper right corner, when I come to these pages. Which brings me to the next item…
You know you love it when I do that! But only if the post requires background music! Now everybody else...

4. Busy Pages…Too many pictures…too many surveys…too much every damn thing. These pages take FOREVER to load. I don’t care if I’m on the laptop at home or on the pc at work or on the crackberry…it’s still a slow download. Me and patience broke up years ago…not able!
Whoo lawd! You ain't said but a word! Wait... Mine ain't busy is it? Cause if it is then you need to upgrade...

5. Constant Secks Sex Talk…I enjoy talking about secks sex about as much as any other hot blooded female, however I need more than that. I don’t wanna read about how you got that good good or how big “junior” is or how much stamina you have either – some things should be left unsaid. In the past this wasn’t a big deal, but these days, I don’t comment on these posts.
Well, I ain't female. So I don't mind nearly as much... Okay, so what about constant sexual innuendo? Oh, and the strikethroughs are because we use grown folk words ova here!

6. No Reciprocity…blogging is a sharing caring community…you visit me and I visit you. I know I am guilty of not visiting everyone that visits me regularly though, so let me know if I’m neglecting you…it is purely by accident.
Yeah. I am trying to make sure that I at least put the page in my favorites if I don't read it that day. And I hate it when I don't get return blogrolled! Okay, I don't hate it. But I used to. But I decided that it was for me to keep up with MY favorites... Just because the other person is a busta...

7. Soliciting…Coming to my blog to advertise your blog, is how you get me to NOT come to your blog. I excuse this from my regs and other T13’rs, but new folks? It’s not necessary. I see a new name and I automatically want to see who you are. Chill.
You know I was gonna ask why you excuse it from the regs. But then I realized that sometimes we have such good stuff that we gotta tell you about it. Like I am gonna do as soon as I post this! But we are so in agreement!

8. Bad Grammar…I’m the queen of broken sentences and I deliberately use bad grammar (regularly)…because hell sometimes it’s just funny to type it that way, but I mix it up. There is a difference between what I do and people who have no business writing a post. These are usually the people who leave the most confusing comments too. *inside joke here* hee hee
Really? So who indeed is the joke really on? I too have encountered a few spots and comments that left me doing that confused monkey head scratch thing...

9. Ya Bore Me! Sorry. I know some people really write for their own enjoyment and this might include writing post after post about their boring life. Just because you have a boring life does not mean you can’t write it with humor and make it interesting. Hell…my life is boring. There’s nothing going on…but you gotta be able to poke fun at yourself and the boring stuff that happens to you to connect with your readers or at least to engage me.
Um... Okay... SOMEBODY is feeling a little mean or something... You know, remember "Keep in mind that I'm an artist. And I am sensitive about my shit" No? Okay... I am witcha sis! I just had to poke fun at ya mean ass!

10. Post Sagas…sometimes I’ll read a really long post and I’m engrossed because it’s just that funny or bizarre, etc. MOST OF THE TIME I AINT ABLE!!! Get to the point! Editing is your friend! So what THIS post is a long one!
LMAO @ "Editing is your friend!" I have grown accustomed to the really long post thanks to Ladylee and Freaky Deaky! You know I bet they can kill a cell phone battery! What? I only pick with those I really like!

11. I don’t like you and/or I can’t relate to you…it’s nothing personal (most of the time).
I need add nothing to this...

12. I don’t do motivational…OK…that’s not entirely true. I stole that line from Rashan - LOL. I lump all the excessively motivational, spiritual and infomercial-style posts in the same pile…and I avoid that pile!
Um... Yep! Except for Miss Kitty. She understands reciprocity (#6, huh?) and you always gotta have at least ONE friend around to keep you from being dragged through the gates of hell without notice. God knows the rest of you ain't able! And she ain't excessively either...

13. Creepy poetry…I don’t dislike poetry as a whole, but all that constant crap about unrequited love and nonsensical crapola that could mean THIS but might mean THAT, but since you’re trying to be so clever and poetic, you’re never really clear about what it is you mean…well all that confusing mumbo jumbo is annoying. Pass
Um... yyyeeeaaaahhhh... I tend to avoid poetry as much as possible. I am good thanks! Prose is my tool and I shalt use it! I may not know art, but I know what I like! Alright, I won't be elitist. SOME poetry is okay.

Now with all that said…there are certain bloggers that I would follow regardless…these are the people I harass to post…the ones who I email harass…text harass…or harass on any level really. Harassing is how I show you my love! lol
Yeah I know. And you been doing it to me from the start. BUT you don't have to harass me today! Cause YOUR post is up!

Happy Birthday Haremite Opinionated Diva!!!!!
Edit: And congrats to you and your family on the arrival of your spanking brand new nephew, only a day late...

Friday, September 19, 2008

DAMN!!! That Was Embarrassing!!!


I cannot help but to admit, I been slipping!

I seem to have forgotten something very important!

Almost too embarrassing to mention really.

Y'all probably gonna laugh y'all asses off.

Which will upset me and make me take my ball and go home!

Not that the hissy fit will make things any better.

Okay, MAYBE it would make me feel better...

Guess I will quit stalling and let you in on the secret too!




Um... I seem to have forgotten my own Second Blogiversary!!!!!

Guess I will have to go back and post one for that day!

Hell one for last year too!

At any rate... Fuck it!

Happy Blogiversary to me!!!!!!

Warning!!! Partially naked chick to follow!!!

Thursday, September 18, 2008

Thursday Thirteen: Favorite TV Characters 2

Here are a few more of my favorite characters as seen on TV. The first was man heavy so I flipped the script on this one.

The originators of this series can be found HERE

Edit: This is a redo. Not as good as the previous never to be seen version but I didn't think you all should have to suffer because of something you had no control over...

Nyota Uhura - The single greatest reason to travel in space in the 22nd century. Her and Yeoman Rand were the main two reasons all them Ensigns named Jones signed on to get maimed or killed on the Enterprise NCC-1701 (Not bloody -A or-B or -C or -D or any other letter...) That Kirk was one lucky muhfugga!!! I wish somebody would have forced me to kiss on that!

Grace Adler - Lucy is back! Red, gorgeous and funny as hell! Except this time instead of being a popular club owner, her Ricky is a gay lawyer. I guess that is progress. Man if only she could fill out a bra or some panties!

Kelly Bundy - Blonde, sexy, dumb, trashy. What more could a dude want for a Saturday night? This eye candy had me cracking up many days. She could still "knock me over with the weather". Her trying to graduate high school is still one of the best moments in TV history!

Alexx Woods - A smart woman in a sexy body enrobed in chocolate. How ain't that the hotness? What more needs to be said? Ladylee? Is that you? No? She is just playing you on TV huh?

Xena - Big, bold, beautiful and beat down. Yeah, the show was kinda campy and a little over the top. But I loved it anyway.

Piper Halliwell - She sure had me Charmed. Smart, sexy, talented, a little 'tude. She made me like skinny women again, the witch! All I wanna know is what a brotha gotta do to get a spell put on him?

Jack McFarland - Not a lady but a queen. And since Dana Scully was the lone lady on the last post, he gets her spot here. Wildly funny and way gayer than I could ever imagine a dude.

Trudy Joplin - This gal had a name plate on her desk that said "Big Booty Trudy"! I have been hers ever since!

Kelly Garrett - Everybody has a favorite Angel. This one was mine. How smoking is she? When I me the real lady some 20+ years after the show, she was STILL smoking hot!!! A tiny little thing though...

Denise Huxtable - After she lost them braces, she gained me! Yeah I got a weakness for light, bright and a shade from white. I gotta love me afterall. But she definitely made me look forward to college that year!

Max Guevara - Hot! The bad girl image, the motorcycle and the super powers only added to the wonderfulness! Hell I don't even remember what most of the episodes of Dark Angel were about. But I know why I was watching!

Catwoman - Each alone is a good reason for being in this list. Together omitting them would be a straight crime! Man I sure did like black sequined body stockings back in the day!

Wonder Woman - Do I really need to explain this one? Too bad that campy was the name of the game in the 60's and 70's when doing super heroes. Sure could use some of her now that Smallville seems to be creating the Justice League. Hell I didn't even know I liked Hispanic women until she came along!

Blogger Is A Jackass!!!

Well. My Thursday Thirteen post seems to have come to a shitty end. Blogger is acting a straight jackass. So all of the content that I added over the last couple of hours is gone into the ether...


Muthafuck you Blogger witcha bitchass self!!!!


Back to your regularly scheduled programming... already in progress...

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Even More Politricks?

Something I found circulating on my Family's Website...
Apparently The Michigan Messenger posted the following article.
According to the Detroit News, The Obama campaign and the Democratic National Committee filed the suit in U.S. District Court against the Michigan GOP over this report. The Republican Party denies using such tactics.

Read and then research for yourself. But most of all be aware...

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Sarah Massey

The Michigan GOP has announced plans to use a list of housing foreclosures as the basis for a broad voter-caging operation, as reported yesterday by Eartha Jane Melzer in The Michigan Messenger.

James Carabelli, chairman of the Republican Party in Macomb County, Michigan, has announced plans to assign "election challengers" to polling places to question the eligibility of home foreclosure victims based on residency.

"We will have a list of foreclosed homes and will make sure people aren't voting from those addresses," Carabelli told the Messenger.

Today Teresa James, attorney for the voting rights organization Project Vote, and author of the 2007 report Caging Democracy: A 50-Ye ar History of Partisan Challenges to Minority Voters, issued the following statement in response:

The Macomb County GOP's plan is a cynical partisan attempt to suppress the vote of thousands of low-income and African-American voters, a replay of the 2004 threats of mass challenges. Just because you're behind on your mortgage doesn't mean you lose the right to vote. All a foreclosure filing tells anyone is that the owners are behind on their mortgage; it does not mean a voter has necessarily moved. Foreclosures take time. And even if the plan is to only challenge voters whose homes have actually been sold at auction, the challengers will still achieve nothing but to slow-down voting and create an intimidating atmosphere at strategically chosen polls.

Michigan law says that challenges may be made at the polls if the challenger "knows or has good reason to suspect" a voter is ineligible. The Michigan Secretary of State has clarified this to require that challenges should be based on "reliable sources or means." Republican challengers with only a list of foreclosure notices will have NO evidence or reliable source to suggest that eligible voters have moved and are no longer eligible to vote.

This is just the latest -- and most transparent -- in a long history of racially and politically motivated GOP attacks against Michigan voters, designed to suppress votes by disenfranchising individual voters and creating confusion and delays at the polls. In 1999, right-wing volunteers in Hamtramck, Michigan systematically challenged the citizenship of voters with dark skin and Arabic-sounding names. In 2004 and 2006, Republicans reportedly recruited thousands of paid challengers to disrupt predominantly African-American precincts.

"If we do not suppress the Detroit vote," a GOP state representative was quoted as saying in 2004, "we're going to have a tough time in this election cycle."

As the Messenger reports, Macomb Count y is in the top three-percent of counties in the U.S. hit hardest by the foreclosure crisis -- and African-Americans, as the primary victims of sub-prime lending practices, make up the majority of these cases. African-Americans also tend to vote democratic, which is why it's not surprising that the GOP would target these voters for suppression.

Regardless of politics, no one faced with the possibility of losing their home should also have to lose their vote. Project Vote is writing to ask Michigan Secretary of State, Republican Terri Lynn Land, to instruct election officials that someone's presence on a list of foreclosure notices is not a legitimate basis for challenging that individual's right to vote. Project Vote will also send letters to both major parties, reviewing the acceptable criteria for voter challenges under Michigan law, and if necessary will file lawsuits on behalf of disenfranchised voters.

In America you get to vote even if you're behind on your bills. All Americans -- particularly those members of the community hit hardest by the economic crisis -- deserve a voice and a vote on Election Day.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Things Heard While On A Rant

And we got nothing to be guilty of
Our love will climb any mountain...

I want to go outside, in the rain
It may sound crazy
But I wanna go outside, in the rain...

Living just enough
just enough for the city...

I'm never gonna dance again
Guilty feet have got no rhythm...

I'm sippin' on Tanqueray with my mind on my money and my mouth on the ganjay
R A G to the muthafuckin' E
Back wit my nigga S N double O P
Yeah! And you don't stop...

Just a city boy, born and raised in south Detroit.
He took the midnight train going anywhere...

That's what you are
Though near or far...

I got a penthouse in Manhattan
Two more in Malibu
I got an '87 Cadillac Seville
I got a Maserati too...

Would you mind
If I touched, if I kissed, if I held you tight
In the morning light, yeah...

As around the sun the earth knows she's revolving
And the rosebuds know to bloom in early May
Just as hate knows love's the cure
You can rest your mind assured
That I'll be loving you always...

I hope you
That you've been checkin' me
I know what you're talkin' bout
You got me trippin' on my own feet...

All alone on a Sunday morning
Outside I see the rain is falling, whoa
Inside I'm slowly dying
But the rain won't hide my crying, crying, crying...

Troubles With King Syndrome

Yesterday's post was put out late last night. And you may have noticed it didn't have a title. Today a post with a title OOPS!!! NOW it has a title...

I figured out why it took me so long to do it. And why it was essentially a lazy blog that was typed.

Why do you ask? Oh several negative emotions regarding the folk I live with.

These derive from something I call King Syndrome. King Syndrome is where a man escapes the confines of life as is has come to be and falls into a world where he feels things as are they SHOULD BE. I spent the weekend out with The Wife. I tend to do this at least a couple of times a month. This happens for a few reasons.

  1. I need time away from these damn inmates! Prison, asylum, call it what you want. But that is what they be!
  2. To see how well cared for mom will be in my absence. I can't be here all the damn time and those other people she is supporting need to step up and earn their comforts without my interference (being their safety net).
  3. With my wife is WHERE I BELONG!
  4. Some exit strategies need to be phased in slowly instead of being forced on the populace at large unexpectedly.
  5. There is a great deal of leechism going on here and I am tired of being one of them. My living expenses are being provided for me by not me. So I make the best of it by making sure the person who is taking care of me is as well taken care of as I can manage.
I could go on but I think you are getting the point. Needless to say, that wen I am gone, I start to feeling like a king again! But then I return and find myself amidst a black hole of motivationlessness. Never thought I would look forward to getting out to class like I do. I am starting to regret taking that web class. I could be staring at the young and inappropriately dressed instead of staying stuck in the house. But I know why I did that one. 10% laziness and 90% not leaving her to them for that many days in a week. Although I am gonna have to get over that...

The problem with King Syndrome is that good times come to a rapid end. And I return to... this place... It ain't home...

But on my return I notice several things almost immediately that are not right. This destroys the afterglow naturally. Good emotions are replaced with bad. I find myself pissed off because nobody really bothers to clean up after the dog. This means noboby bothered to take him outside so he WOULDN'T need to be cleaned up after. I mean hell I hate doing it sometimes but it is like a preemptive strike. I would rather be cold and sleepily walking like a drunk than smell a wood floor that has been pissed on. And I find that things are out of place or plain missing. Man, I feel my blood pressure spiking right now. If suddenly start talking crazy or you see the same character repeat itself a bunch of times, it is because you witnessed a stroke at the keyboard. Just thinking about that backwards ass shit is pissing me off.

IDK. Maybe it is just me and I am a closet control freak and need to get my shit together and... Okay fuck that. I ain't the one fucked up. The more order I try to establish in this joint the more chaos ensues. It ain't me. Anybody who knows me knows two things about me (that apply to this situation...) 1) I am live and let live. If you ain't messing up my groove, I ain't gonna be in yours. 2) EVERYTHING has a place. I am no neat freak, in fact I am somewhat packratish. But I think that for things to exist in my space they have to have a purpose and a place. So living with folk who don't understand that keeping their shit to themselves keeps me outta that shit and we all are happy is a problem. And in addition those same people not understanding that utility of things (and people) having a purpose AND a place bother me to no end. Hell I can't even get my damn mail without going on a damn scavenger hunt. I done found mail with my name on it in every room in the joint. Strangely enough it never ends up in the ONE place I am guaranteed to see it, the chair I am sitting in now.

And don't let me turn my back too long. The stuff that is used to provide comfort and support for the person who is taking care of this House of Leeches will walk the hell off. Mom is the only person who can't bathe herself (unless Lil B. is in the house), so there are wash basins here for that purpose. Why did I spend a half-hour last night looking for one while constantly bitching about the FOUR of them missing when I was trying to get her cleaned up? And she needed a shirt change once I managed to get her clean. Why could I not find one of the FIVE shirts I got for her LAST MONTH when her clothes were washed and returned earlier in the day?

Anyway. I am getting tired of bitching today. And since you have spent all this time reading all of this, I give you The Money Shot!

I am really hating this place and these folk. So if I tell you I am coming to a town near you sometime next summer, know two things.
  1. We gots to hang! Eat, drunk and get merry and all that shit.
  2. You got homework. Because I will likely be in the area because of an opportunity, so I am gonna know where the GOOD spots to live in your town are.
  3. If it is biker dude calling, I may be coming to steal a corner in some unused room, if you got one (yeah I know I said two...)
Much love!

Monday, September 15, 2008

You know. I ain't got jack shit today. Mostly because I don't feel like thinking. Or emoting out loud. Or... Hell I don't even feel like explaining.

I will give this another try tomorrow.

By the time you read this, I might actually have a real post up.

I ain't promising nothing though. I might feel the same tomorrow.

Dap to the fellas. Booty grabs to the ladies.

That is all...


Friday, September 12, 2008

A Very Interesting Product

You know. I think I might have to get me one of these...

If you feel the need to wonder why, either you don't know me or YOU need therapy!

What is it you ask? Well the answer is right here!

Campus Sightings

I done seen some things on campus these last couple of weeks.

At this point in my life, things are pretty hard to come by that produce shock and awe. So of course me starting back to school exposes me to a lot of things that I might not necessarily see in my otherwise everyday travels.

I preface this by saying that the last time I was in class was almost 15 years ago. Children who were starting kindergarten are now classmates! Y2K was still more than half a decade away. Gangsta rap was hip hop. Fashions that were in then are on the verge of coming back. Long story short, things done changed a bunch!

Things that I found strange, shocking or noteworthy as spied by my naked eyes:

There was this dude I saw the other day who was probably the craziest looking thing I thought I would ever see. He was a white guy of average height. He was as skinny as a rail. He had a beard so full that it made Grizzly Adams look somewhat well shaven. But MOST noticeably he had the skinniest pair of blue jeans that I have ever seen on anyone sporting a package. How skinny you ask? Well, my older folk will probably remember the days when the ladies would buy a pair of jeans and then take them home and sew the seams so that they would fit close all the way down to the ankle. Well his were almost that skinny! And I mean high school skinny if you ain't catching on. Size zero skinny. I almost stared... hard...
Imagine the dude above with a hair game like the one below. But with black hair!

Y'all understand why I was tempted to stare?

I know fashions and modesty have changed. I see the kids running around nekkid here and there. But until I was nearly overwhelmed visually, I didn't realize how things changed. First is the shamelessness. Hooker brands galore. Thongs on display. Donkey asses with low rise jeans where you could swear you see the ass crack. Thick hips. Thick thighs. Milk maids. Tight shirts over round bellies. REALLY tight shirts where you can see the outline of the belly button crater. And enough cleavage to fill two years of Cosmo issues. I may be seeing the world through Dirty Old Man Eyes now. Whatever it is, I think I am gonna enjoy being on campus! Especially in the spring when they clothes come back off after the winter! I am almost sorry I am taking the online section of Astronomy!!!!

Can y'all imagine this chick with jeans that give her plumber's crack?

EDIT: For Realhustla... The two ladies in the above picture are Milk Maids. This is the basic configuration with the boob size, cleavage revealed and lack of shirt near the neck line in these approximate ratios. In other words, they make me want milk.... from the source... (actually these ladies are a bit smaller than what I been enjoying...)

Now I saw this kid, who seemed to be about 20 or so. I could be wrong but I think he is goth. He had on a black t-shirt and a black jacket.
He also was sporting some pants similar to these:

And he had some shit similar to this on his arms:

I was tempted to ask him what the deal was with the outfit. But I didn't want him to jump 60 feet up in the air and land on me with a 15 hit combo!

And I saw an old dude who was trying to relive old glory by riding his bike to class like many others... Oh. Wait... That was me... Boy did my ass hurt after that one! The ride was just fine but getting used to a bike seat again ain't the thing to do!

Thursday, September 11, 2008

A Day Of Remembrance

Today is the seventh anniversary of the worst terrorist attack committed on American soil. That is if you don't count the wars of previous centuries or various government policies...

The world has been an eventful place these last seven years. Because of this, that tragedy has become a thing that is fading from the minds of many who were not directly affected. You all have been living it as I have, so I need not get into the details.

But on that day, almost 3000 families lost loved ones. Why isn't really important today. That debate has gone on for a while now.

Since that day another 4100 or so families have lost loved ones in response to the attacks on that day. At least that is the chain of events we are being fed...

A cataclysmic event happened in 2005 which devastated a city and it's surrounding areas. Over 1800 died. Over 700 missing. Thousands and thousands of people displaced.

A day of elation and heartbreak in February of 1994.

The coldest day of my life happened in October of 1987.

I could go on. But I think you get the point.

Today is one of those days that should be set aside for remembering. Each of the above individual days is one that changed my life. Each event taught me something. Each event ended something that I did not want to end. Each event reminds me to remember the people and not the events. We have history books and documents for the events.

The other 4100 people also bear a lesson. But today is not for debating or teaching. Today is for remembering. And I shall remember again so the memories won't fade.

Sunday, September 07, 2008

The Rapper In Me

You know about umpteen years ago. Me and my cousin Profit J. were talking about music. Eventually the conversation turned to the kinds of dudes putting out records at the time. Hammer and Vanilla Ice were big then.

So and idea formed... Obviously talent was no longer needed to secure a contract! So me and he were thinking about forming a rap group!

Were were gonna call ourselves No Talent Individuals! The first single was gonna be entitled In It For The Money. On the album Mo Money To Get The Hunnies! He was gonna be Profit Jay. I was gonna be Unpoetic Lou. Our main hook was to sample Elvis songs. We were gonna be the crossover kings. We would have made a mint!

Ah the days...

Should have did that shit though!!!

Thursday, September 04, 2008

School Madness: Tha Audio Update

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