A Nigga Moment

Webster defines the Nigga Moment as a moment when ignorance overwhelms the mind of an otherwise logical negro man. Causing him to act in an illogical, self destructive manner. i.e. like a nigga.

- Huey Freeman

Yes friends. You heard me right. Last night I had the misfortune of witnessing a Nigga Moment. What happened you ask? Well, I'll tell you.

Apparently there was a beef. Not cow but some BULL! Okay Bullshit! Somebody please tell me why some 20 year old dude (who we shall call Big Doof) just comes outta the blue and start talking shit to the young folk gathered (not bothering nobody) on my street? I mean they were grouped up being teens and not causing anybody any trouble. But dude comes over to the block and while they are in the middle of their rap/song and says "y'all some bitches!" Now that is just rude most places. In the hood it definitely is a reason to catch a beatdown. Apparently some random worthless chick is the genesis of the whole thing. Apparently he had a gripe with Young Fella (my nephew's cousin) in particular.

:: Begin flashback ::
The shit started earlier with Big Doof calling on Young Fella's phone while Cock Deebo (the nephew) was on it. And he started talking cash shit. None too smart since were we not in the hood Cock Deebo would be the one in the overalls looking all skrong and resisting Becky Ann's amorous advances. You know all corn fed and lifting hay bales and shit. N-E-Waay, Doof is popping shit on the phone. They put his ass on the iggy train and keep it moving.
:: fade to black, end flashback ::

So after dude calls like 7 dudes some bitches they look at him crazy. Then he asks the random worthless chick whose phone number that was that he called earlier. She points out Young Fella. Big Doof now has a target for the stupidity he came over for. Of course this is a no win sitchiation for him. he just walked on to somebody else's block and challenged a 17 year old to a fight over a girl who obviously feels that playing the field is not only a privilege but a right. Y'all know what happened next right?

Yep. About a minute later he is down taking a count. Did I mention that Young Fella is a little skinny dude and he was all swole? Yeah. It didn't look good. But he got tired of getting that ass whoopin' and the fight broke up.

I didn't have time for that shit because it happened between the Red Wings last two goals of the night. I had a Stanley Cup to watch being hoisted. But after the disappointing end to regulation, I went to get the story. I shook my damn head and went back to Hockeytown. Wouldn't you know it, before overtime had even started this shit had started up again. Apparently Doofball came back with his uncle who said "He came back for a rematch". What the fuck? And we wonder why the kids are stupid as hell? So after a couple of minutes of folk unsuccessfully diffusing the situation, round two started. A couple of missed swings by both and the grappled up and started slamming each other on Doof's car. By this time I started thinking of ways to "intervene". So I walked to the back of the crib. And I pondered the .22. Looked at the empty clip. Looked at the charging phone. Thought better of both since them .22s have a way of getting me into trouble and I ain't got no love for the Popo because of it. So I said "fuck it!" Went back up front to see the fight all ended and the cops creeping up onto the scene. So much for me having a Nigga Moment too.

And to top all this off I had to watch (basically) two hockey games just to watch the beloved cup NOT be presented on home ice!!!