Dissatisfaction Maximus Part 2

Yep. More of it. Except this time it ain't mine. This time it is The Wife. Why do you ask? Well those reasons are very much related to the reasons for the part 1 of this post. If you need to get up to speed, hit this link Dissatisfaction Maximus.

For her the issues mostly stem from the fact that we are not in the same place. It affects a great deal of things. Outside of the emotional things, it also affects the finances, child rearing, and generally peace of mind. I won't get into the emotional things here. I kinda did that in the first post. And I told her to start blogging to get things off her chest a bit. So I will leave that particular content for her, in case she ever decides to do so. I will touch on the other things.

In reverse order.

Peace of mind is the thing that is most lacking. For her, for me. I think you all pretty much are zoned in on why mine is gone. For her, at least to my point of view, it comes down to one thing once the separation and distance issues are accounted for. That being who she lives with. And yes, you guessed it, they don't call them A Mother for nothing! And don't act like you ain't got one cause you know what I am talking about! The short version is that she is being unnecessarily whiny, petty and self centered (for lack of more wordy and PC terminology). I can understand to a certain extent the effect of having extra folk in your house and all. BUT damn! For instance. If my wife decides she wants to see my face during the week, she has to jump a million unnecessary hoops. Usually she would stop by after work, wait until rush hour traffic died down and head on in. It would take about 15 minutes for her to get here. Around 12 miles driving. But her mother would complain SOOOO much about her leaving the kids there (17 and 16) now she goes to get them before coming by. Lemme frame that for ya. 20-30 minute drive(depending on traffic) to get them (15 miles). Wait for 10-30 minutes for them to get their shit together, AFTER she arrives (like they weren't already warned...). THEN another 20-30 minute ride to get to me (dependent on traffic, 14 more miles). So a 15 minute ride turns into a hour to hour and a half journey! So quite naturally she doesn't spend much time with me during the week. And these are the same grandkids that my MIL doesn't want anyone else to even think about claiming grandparenthood of. Go figure. Yet my BIL will leave his buddies or his girlfriend (who the MIL HATES) there and HE doesn't have to come across town to retrieve his peeps! And of course if she does come by (at all) she has to hear "If you love them so much you should move back in with them". I am really sick of that one. But I won't digress. Or if The Wife decides to rest (after work) instead of doing her mother's bidding, then "I bet you would do it for your HUSBAND or his mother!" Yes the emphasis is there for a reason, cause that is how she does it. And... Shit. So much for the short version. Hell if you ain't got the point by now, YOU need help. On to the next.

Before I get too deep in the rest I have to say that The Wife and I have a strange Yin and Yang thing going on. One strong where the other is weak. One mega where the other is minima. So we are almost completely opposite on a lot of things. Especially the next two.

Child rearing is the next area. This one is not new. But the thing is that it is something that kinda slides on occasion because of absence. My wife is the spoiler. So she gives just because. I am the discipline. I put my foot in their necks, and their asses. I would spoil them more but I can't because she won't bring the smackdown. I am sure you can see the problem with that. Since they ain't with me...

Finances is the other area. The Wife is like the ultimate consumer. Well, not quite. She will do her best to do for everybody, but her. Just to illustrate (this is a fictional account) you will see the kids (16 and 17 remember) walking around with fresh kicks (for the second week in a row) and she will be walking around with her left tit sagging because the bra strap broke. And trust me, she need to support my toys! (I bet you can see me smiling from there!) I on the other hand will seriously consider not buying food if the funds get below a certain point and pay day is more than two days away. Yeah, I am a little psycho about that but hey, I have been caught broke too many times when funds were needed RIGHT THEN! But that is a bad habit I picked up because she isn't a saver. So the problem is I am not there to keep the spending reigned in. Or to add to the fund as it is. You can follow the rest of that line of thought to the logical conclusion.

Needless to say, she is stressed to a breaking point by now. I have been there for a while. Returning our house to a reunited state is becoming the most important thing on both plates. In fact becoming critically important. Almost to the point where making a not so smart financial decision seems like a good idea. Hmm... Things must be bad if we are considering taking an apartment in a complex where the management is sucky, the apartment is too small and it would leave the dog and both our mothers in questionable housing situations.

REALLY CONSIDERING IT!