Campus Sightings

I done seen some things on campus these last couple of weeks.

At this point in my life, things are pretty hard to come by that produce shock and awe. So of course me starting back to school exposes me to a lot of things that I might not necessarily see in my otherwise everyday travels.

I preface this by saying that the last time I was in class was almost 15 years ago. Children who were starting kindergarten are now classmates! Y2K was still more than half a decade away. Gangsta rap was hip hop. Fashions that were in then are on the verge of coming back. Long story short, things done changed a bunch!

Things that I found strange, shocking or noteworthy as spied by my naked eyes:

There was this dude I saw the other day who was probably the craziest looking thing I thought I would ever see. He was a white guy of average height. He was as skinny as a rail. He had a beard so full that it made Grizzly Adams look somewhat well shaven. But MOST noticeably he had the skinniest pair of blue jeans that I have ever seen on anyone sporting a package. How skinny you ask? Well, my older folk will probably remember the days when the ladies would buy a pair of jeans and then take them home and sew the seams so that they would fit close all the way down to the ankle. Well his were almost that skinny! And I mean high school skinny if you ain't catching on. Size zero skinny. I almost stared... hard...
Imagine the dude above with a hair game like the one below. But with black hair!

Y'all understand why I was tempted to stare?


I know fashions and modesty have changed. I see the kids running around nekkid here and there. But until I was nearly overwhelmed visually, I didn't realize how things changed. First is the shamelessness. Hooker brands galore. Thongs on display. Donkey asses with low rise jeans where you could swear you see the ass crack. Thick hips. Thick thighs. Milk maids. Tight shirts over round bellies. REALLY tight shirts where you can see the outline of the belly button crater. And enough cleavage to fill two years of Cosmo issues. I may be seeing the world through Dirty Old Man Eyes now. Whatever it is, I think I am gonna enjoy being on campus! Especially in the spring when they clothes come back off after the winter! I am almost sorry I am taking the online section of Astronomy!!!!

Can y'all imagine this chick with jeans that give her plumber's crack?


EDIT: For Realhustla... The two ladies in the above picture are Milk Maids. This is the basic configuration with the boob size, cleavage revealed and lack of shirt near the neck line in these approximate ratios. In other words, they make me want milk.... from the source... (actually these ladies are a bit smaller than what I been enjoying...)


Now I saw this kid, who seemed to be about 20 or so. I could be wrong but I think he is goth. He had on a black t-shirt and a black jacket.
He also was sporting some pants similar to these:


And he had some shit similar to this on his arms:

I was tempted to ask him what the deal was with the outfit. But I didn't want him to jump 60 feet up in the air and land on me with a 15 hit combo!

And I saw an old dude who was trying to relive old glory by riding his bike to class like many others... Oh. Wait... That was me... Boy did my ass hurt after that one! The ride was just fine but getting used to a bike seat again ain't the thing to do!